Brown Sugar and Minced Meat...mmm

THIS IS MY CAT. HAMSTER.

Tonight, I am home alone. As usual when this rare avent occurs, disaster ensues. Tonight it was in the form of minced meat and sparkling wine.

      Needless to say there is a rather large mess in my kitchen. As I discovered earlier that I am in fact not the culinary expert I believed I was, I am not a very enthusiastic cleaner either. After viewing my drunk father cooking unfortunately an idea was spawned. That apparently brown sugar tastes great when mixed with any form of meat. This idea is false, as the sugar caramelised in the frying pan and made my meat taste like fudge. It may seem like an interesting combination to try, however my bowels have to disagree. The texture was also very strange, my cat agrees with me viemently and she is willing to lick her own ass.

TODAYS LESSON: DO NOT leave me home alone to cook for myself.